{150}

Trav just completed his 150th treatment Thursday...
we didn't throw a party or anything.
That would have been weird.

But I do think it's pretty remarkable.
I'd wager that there aren't many RCC patients who have been on this drug for so long.
In fact, we are thinking of contacting the company who makes it and seeing if they want to
buy our story...

(I kid. Unless there is a rep for Torisel reading this...and then we are open for negotiation).

Just thought I'd let you all know Trav's doing fine.
Just gearing up for 151 this week...lucky guy.

Crossing our fingers for a good scan in October.
I'm thinking I wont be updating till then. ;)

Results

I like scans on Thursdays.
Sure, it makes for an incredible tiring day for T
because he has to drink barium at 11 pm, 4 am, 5 am, and 6 am and be at the scan by 7 am.
And then he gets his poison injected at 3 pm, making him extra tired....
but at least we don't have to wait 3 days for results.

Here they are.
His rib, lungs, and liver are fairly stable.
His rib tumors have grown again, but just slightly.

The Doctor wants to really keep his eye on those tumors, but feels like it's best to stay on the
current treatment for the next 3 months and we will scan again.

We are crossing fingers for no more tumor growth there so we can continue the path we are on.

As usual, we are overwhelmed by the kindness shown to us on hard days like this.
I had 2 dinners brought to me.
2.
And I may or may not have ate them both.

And the texts, e-mails, and phone calls are so appreciated.
And the diet cokes.

We have great friends.
Thank you!!

Bleck. It's scan time again.

Yep, it's scan time again. I've made it almost 4 months without even looking at this blog. (Thanks for those of you who have commented since my last post, I just saw them and sure appreciate people for checking in on us!)

The scan is set for Thursday, and as usual the freaking out/grumpiness that accompany some of us (um, me), have already set in. We sure appreciate all the fasting, praying and well wishing you want to do for us. Really, we appreciate it more then you know.

Things have been fairly normal for us lately, but there are a few things I'm a bit worried about. For the past 3 weeks Trav's legs have been swelling. (He now understands the term 'cankles' and can sympathize with how I felt pregnant). And while it was kinda funny to make jokes about it for a while, it is worrisome. I'm not sure why it has been happening, but it seems like they are finally getting it under control. Let's pray that it doesn't end up being anything major.

And his chest pain has been really bad. Like, wake up in the middle of the night in pain bad. It seems like he goes through spurts where this happens, so I'm really hoping it's just normal...but we always worry.

If your wondering what the worst part of dealing with cancer for us is, I would say uncertainty. If Trav gets a bad chest cold, we worry that it might be something to do with cancer. If he has a funny pain in his back, we worry. If he pulls a muscle, we worry. We never know if it's cancer attacking, or just normal pains everyone gets. We are never certain that his medicine is working, because if we are honest with ourselves, we know that we've had an amazing run with this medication so far, and our luck could run out at any time. It would be so nice to plan ahead in our lives with certainty that things will go smoothly. I miss not worrying about every. single. thing.

That being said, we have been so blessed to have had so much go our way, and know that we are lucky in comparison to some. We are so thankful for all the time we have been given. But we are greedy! We want more! So yeah, go ahead and send us some good vibes.

I will update as soon as we hear. Trav has a treatment Thursday afternoon, so maybe the Doctor will be able to get results by the time he goes in. Wouldn't that be nice?

Love to all.

Results

I don't have much time tonight, so I'll make it quick.

The results were decent.

Shrinkage!!! in the rib!!
A small amount of growth in the tumors in his kidney (yes, tumor(s). I always thought there was only 1, but there are 2. Imagine how dumb I felt when I freaked out after seeing the #2 and hearing Trav tell me that they've always been there...I'm a moron.)
The lesion on the liver is showing up again, but I'm pretty sure it's always been there and was just looked over last time.
And the lungs are stable.

Kidney function is good.

We feel very loved. I received a million inquiring phone calls/e-mails/and texts over the past few days.

We are blessed.
We are lucky.
And we are gonna enjoy the next 3 months-till the next scan reminds us how sucky this stuff is.

Love to all.

Scan Time.

In the last post I mentioned that T's kidney function wasn't as good as the Dr. would have liked and that they were going to try and lessen his dose of meds to see what would happen.

Well when they lessened his dose his function started doing better, and is now back to where it should be, so they have upped his meds and will continue to watch it closely and make sure his kidney keeps doing it's job well.

We are really relieved that his function improved and now just pray it will continue to do well so we wont have to switch his medication. We are so thankful for a drug that has worked for us with minimal side effects, and our other options just don't sound too appealing. :)

Tuesday he will have another scan. It's been a while and being that he had a few weeks of a smaller dose of medicine, we are a little nervous....so if you wanna say a prayer or two...we will sure appreciate it!

Thanks again to everyone who reads this blog and offers kind thoughts on our behalf. We are so grateful for the army of people who take such great care of us!

Those [insert favorite swear word here] Kidneys.

It seems with T's cancer, whenever we get back to 'normal' and comfortable, things smack us in the face again.

This time, it's back where it all began.

The kidney.

Each week when T goes in for a treatment he gets his blood drawn to check his kidney function (keep in mind he only has 1 kidney left, so we like it to work...)

The past 2 weeks, it hasn't been great.
Today at treatment 127, the Dr. decided he needed to lower his normal dose of poison for the next few weeks to see if it brings his kidney function back up. His concern is that our wonder drug is doing the damage to his kidney function.

Not really great news.

And I'm not sure what to pray for.

Here is the dilemma in a nutshell:

If it is the drug is doing the damage, then he will obviously have to try something new. New side effects. New worries that it may not work. New game plan. We are kinda used to our game plan now, and in our dreamland would really like to stick with it for...ever. In the sad world of RCC there aren't a whole lot of options, so the longer we can stick with one drug, the better. Way better.

But, if it isn't the drug doing the damage, then that means for some reason, his kidney just isn't doing it's job, and that's no bueno.

You see the problem, right?

Tonight we are once again reminded of how awful this beast is, and how much we really loathe it. You hate it too, yes?

So if your wondering what to pray for, join the club. We aren't really sure. But asking for good kidney function and a wonder drug to keep working is a start, and we can hope the big guy upstairs gets our concerns.

Thanks for checking in, we always appreciate your support.

3 years

3 years ago tomorrow, I wrote this post on our family blog.

3 years! And as of Thursday 118 treatments! My goodness. Time flies when your having fun...haha!

I spent a good while reading through the posts that Christmas and was overwhelmed with emotion. I read through very wet and blurry eyes and have been thinking so much about all that has happened since.

I will never forget that Christmas. I will never forget sitting in the Doctors office and the look on his face as he told us Trav's results. I will never forget how completely and utterly terrified I felt then. I wont soon forget driving Trav home from his first treatment in a complete blizzard. I wont forget waiting...and wondering what kind of reaction he would have to the poison in his body. I'd like to forget the empty feeling I had when I really had time to sit down and think about what we were facing, but still hanging on to those memories too. I wont forget the awful prognosis we received, and thinking "could this be our last family Christmas?"

I also will never forget how taken care of we were that year. Daily we would come home to gifts of kindness on our front door from faceless friends. We were so blessed. (We are still, I know). I wont forget the flowers, gifts for my kids, and cookies (my thighs still haven't forgot those cookies!). I wont forget the words that so many people spoke to us that pulled us out of our funk. I wont forget the strangers who let me know they too, were praying for our family. I wont ever forget how much we learned to lean on one another, and so many of you that Christmas.

That Christmas 3 years ago, was the most awful and most beautiful Christmas to date. And as our 3 year cancerversary (I made that word up..you like?) comes near, I can't help but feel so very thankful for all the time our family has been given.

3 years! 3 Christmases! And gosh darn it, I'm counting on more then that.

My favorite thing about looking back at our life then, is comparing it to now. We have sure learned to adapt! Sometimes it's so easy for even us to forget how sick T is. What a blessing! We have been able to really enjoy the past 3 years. Sure, we would like to take Thursday nights out of the week completely...and when T is really in pain, we are reminded again, and yes those pesky scans come along and give us a swift reminder...but still, life is good!

I just wanted to remind myself how blessed our little family has been and to thank all of you who are still here, and who have been here all along. We are so so so thankful. It's such a beautiful time for us to be reminded of what's important.

I can't imagine anything noteworthy coming up on the old cancer blog before Christmas, so I'm wishing you all a Very Merry one!