Thursday, September 12, 2013

Warrior.

For the past 5 years Travis has been a warrior.
He's done 6 different chemo's.
And not chemo's you get monthly,
but weekly or daily.

He's experienced extreme fatigue.
Nausea.
Stomach Ailments.
Many aches and pains.
Mouth sores,
Throat cankers,
Odd rashes,
and insomnia.
Kidney failure.
Many hospital stays.

Through it all he has worked full time 
(Most of the time).
He's been the best dad.
I'm sorry, but I'm positive there is none better.
He's been the most supportive husband.
He's provided for us.
Made us laugh daily.
Bought us ice-cream.
Made us watch football.
Yelled at every soccer game/dance recital.
Been patient when I ask "Does my hair look ok?"
(Cause, really, he doesn't care).

Through it all we have wondered when we would
run out of drug options-and prayed for many miracles.

And we've had a few.

But that time has come.

Our most recent scan shows a pretty sizable amount
of growth, in pretty much all of the current areas his cancer lies.
We've exhausted all of our treatment options.
Yes, there are a few drugs we haven't tried,
but they are pretty much in the same drug type as ones we've used,
so the chances of them working are nil.
We've prepared for this.
We've known it would come,
but man,
it sucks.
There isn't an eloquent way to put it.
It sucks real bad.
We are going to try to enjoy what time we have left.
We know there isn't enough of it,
but we are gonna do our best to spoil each other while we can.
 We are gonna do our best to remind our kids,
every single day,
that while they may not always have a dad here with them,
they had a dad who fought like hell to be with them as long as he could.
Last week Travis and I celebrated our 11th anniversary.
Today-I am reminded how honored I am to have been able to be by his side
and his partner while he fights.  I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat.
We appreciate our TRAVSTRONG family who has supported us 
so much through it all.  We love you.

17 comments:

Kristin @ Navy Bean Lane said...

I love you Hay. And my heart is breaking for you right now. You guys have and continue to fight the good fight every. single. day. And I admire you for that. However much time you have left together will be precious, sweet and lived to the fullest I am sure! Loves and hugs!!

Mortons Love said...

Oh Friends,

Scott and I are heartbroken! That seems like a insignificant way to feel considering the gravity of the situation, but...

I want you both to know that I have learned how to gracefully deal with serious trials in my life by watching you both! I know our situations are different and I'm not trying to equate them (yours is for sure the hardest of the hard). But just the same you have dealt with it with grace and love! What other way is there?

I know you have been frustrated, mad and everything else (as you should be) but you always try to see the positive and be grateful for it.

Thank you.

Please know that our family is with you, thinking, and praying as you journey through this inconceivably difficult time!

We love you!
XOXO

Nicholas said...

Hayley and Travis, our hearts are aching for you. You are very blessed to have each other and your beautiful girls. Enjoy this time together as much as possible and know that you will always be thought of and in our prayers. Much love, Zach and Lindsay

Kris said...

I have followed your blog for awhile now and come to love the strangers I will never meet. I check daily for updates. I pray for you all several times a day. Your love and strength as a family is amazing. Your legacy you leave of your togetherness is unmatched. You Mr Travis, are the very definition of a warrior. One that loves his family and will fight to the very end to be with them. And you sweet Hayley are a warrior as well. You have been a warrior as a wife, a mother, and one that will carry on your husbands warrior spirit forever!! I am forever changed in my life from readying your story. Please know you will continue to be in my prayers......

Jamie said...

My heart and prayers truly go out to you and your beautiful family. You are all such wonderful examples of endurance and hope. My heart aches for the trials you have had to go through and I truly wish your family all the very best through this last stretch. Wish there was so much more I can do for you.

Grandmajoann said...

You are an amazing family.
You have done so much.
Travis has been a strong man. We are all shocked at how much he has put up with. At how sick he has been at times, well, most of the time. We will double our prayers and hope he can remain with us for quite a while yet! We love you.

Billye Sue said...

Love you so much, Hayley! And I admire you. You've been a great example to me, more than you will ever know. No need to reply to this or post it. Just know that you and your family are in my prayers, and how truly, honestly, and completely grateful I am for eternity. You will have your happily ever after! No, you already have it.
All my love, Billye Sue

Andrea said...

Oh Haley. I am so sorry. You have been an inspiration to me of strength, courage and grace. Let me know if I can do anything and now that I am back in the valley. I would love to have you for lunch and reconnect. When you have time I thought with Ashley and Jamie might be fun. Hugs to you. My thoughts and prayers are with you both.

tamaram49 said...

I am so Sorry. I lost my husband to pheochromocytoma (rare cancer) in May of 2007. It takes a strong person to fight this disease, and, like your warrior, my husband fought till the end. However, a strange peace came over both of us when we realized that there was nothing left to do but enjoy what time we had. Some of my best memories are from those precious weeks we had together. I am praying you and Travis and your sweet girls enjoy the time you have left together as an earthly family. Love, Tamara

Darin and Joanna said...

Hayley, Im so sorry. I have checked in on your blog over the past five years and have been amazed to watch how gracefully you and your family have handled this trial. You are an amazing wife and mother. Enjoy your time together. You and your girls have been so lucky to have a guy like Travis in your life and how lucky he is to have you! The memories you have made will last a lifetime! My prayers are with you!!

Miss Nelson said...

Words are not enough, but please know how sorry I am!! My heart is breaking for you and your amazing family. I've prayed for you every night since I first learned of Travis's cancer. I hope you know how amazingly strong you are, and what an example you are to me, Hayley!

Tara said...

Trav and Hayley. My heart goes out to the both of you and know that you both are truly amazing. Please know we are thinking and praying for you and your beautiful family.

Rebecca said...

You don't know me, but I, like many, have been following your amazing family for a long time. I am so sad to hear of this news. I think of and pray for your family often. I have lost several family members to this nasty disease, but I can't begin to know how you are felling at this time. I will continue to keep you, your amazing Travis, and your beautiful girls in my prayers. You are all truly amazing example of enduring to the end and fighting a united fight. I know that thru our Savior you can be comforted and strengthened thru this difficult, heart wrenching, yet incredibly precious time. You are all loved by many strangers. I wish for your remaining time to full of love, hope, and joy. Much love, Rebecca

Tami Knight said...

Travis and I lived by each other during elementary school. I remember the hole in the fence we had that went from his backyard to mine. We were always sneaking over to each others house! Through jr high and high school he was always an example. He might not realize it (mostly because he was a teenage boy and I never told him) but he was always nice to me when others were not. We had a class together freshman year where nobody would sit by me. He came into the room and noticed the situation. He came and not only sat by me but he talked to me! That moment of pure genuine kindness has been a sweet memory. I am saddened at the trials he and your family have endured but as I have read your blog I can see that he has continued to be the Travis that I remember. A true hero and warrior!! My family continues to pray for yours. I hope that your time with him burns amazing memories for you to hold onto once he rejoins his loving Heavenly Father. Please give my love to him and let him know I have no doubt my mom will find him in heaven to welcome him. Love to you both.....Tami (Belew) Knight

Tami Knight said...

Travis and I lived by each other during elementary school. I remember the hole in the fence we had that went from his backyard to mine. We were always sneaking over to each others house! Through jr high and high school he was always an example. He might not realize it (mostly because he was a teenage boy and I never told him) but he was always nice to me when others were not. We had a class together freshman year where nobody would sit by me. He came into the room and noticed the situation. He came and not only sat by me but he talked to me! That moment of pure genuine kindness has been a sweet memory. I am saddened at the trials he and your family have endured but as I have read your blog I can see that he has continued to be the Travis that I remember. A true hero and warrior!! My family continues to pray for yours. I hope that your time with him burns amazing memories for you to hold onto once he rejoins his loving Heavenly Father. Please give my love to him and let him know I have no doubt my mom will find him in heaven to welcome him. Love to you both.....Tami (Belew) Knight

Mauchley said...

Travis,

I just found out this news this morning. My heart hurts for you. I have known you for many years. You have always been a great example to me. Going through elementary school, middle school, Young Men's, Scouts and High School.

You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. May you be blessed with peace in your heart and your family have the strength that is needed.

God Bless you

Jason Mauchley

Mauchley said...

Travis,

I just read the latest post in the blog. My heart hurts for you and your family. Words escape me on what to say (which as you know is rare).

You have always been an example to me. Looking back I can remember you as far back as my memory goes. Playing on Little League baseball and soccer teams (yeah I played soccer believe it or not ). Going to Elementary school, Missle school, Scout Camp, Aaronic Priesthood Training, serving in Aaronic Priesthood postions together and High School.

You have fought like a warrior. I think of the Helman's Stripling Warriors and you are marching with them.

You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. May God grant you and your family the strength that is needed in this trying time.

May you have peace in your heart.

God Bless

Jason Mauchley