Tuesday, February 9, 2010


Have you noticed that we tend to just ignore this blog? I think it's a pretty good metaphor mirroring how we deal with T's cancer. We like to just let it sit in the back of our minds, but don't like to stir things up too often. Call it denial if you will, but we like it this way! ;)

Just remember. No news = Good news.

Since my last post things have been going pretty well. Trav's back pain was pretty unbearable for a while there till they figured out what was going on. Since he only has 1 kidney he has to be careful with the pain meds he is taking, so the Doc. prescribed him some Celebrex.

You know Celebrex right? It's the commercial that is chuck full of old peeps.

We just laugh. But, it has helps and for that we are so thankful!

The last few weeks I've been reflecting quite a bit on the journey we've been on in the last few years. I've stumbled on to a lot of blogs of others who are facing a cancer battle of their own, and it always sends little pictures in my mind of moments we've experienced because of this trial. I remember clear back to the first diagnosis going from thinking he had an ulcer, to learning he has a massive tumor in his kidney, to his kidney being removed all within 2 weeks. I've looked back to that brief moment in time when we thought the cancer was completely gone, and had a few years of "normalcy" before it returned. And when I think back to those times I realize that even then we were completely changed. It's one of those things that I just can't explain, and cannot begin to describe.

I remember the feeling of complete despair the day we found out it came back, and came back with a bang. And when I look back on those first few months I wonder how in the world we've made it to the happy place we are in now.

Really, right now we live life with cancer clear at the back of our minds. Sure, we have days where it is there, but we've learned to find a beautiful balance of normalcy. We have a really wonderful life together, and have learned to accept our future whatever it may be, but we wont let this effect our present. We are too busy cherishing our little ladies, and spoiling them rotten. We are to busy sleeping in Saturday mornings, snuggling in front of the fire while watching American Idol, and getting fired up at each other over board games.

I get scared that we are at this point, because it seems that whenever we get used to "life" again, somehow, something comes along and knocks us down, but it sure is nice to come together as a family, and let that be our focus.

I'm so thankful for those of you who have been here for us to help us find our groove. I'm not naive enough to think that our lives will always be full of this balance we have acquired. I know that our future has a whole lot of unsure holes in it, and I know that I may fall apart many times ahead, but for right now, life just feels so good!

Trav's doing good and we have another month before scan time rolls around, so I imagine I'll continue to ignore this blog till then. (It's for the best, do you see how much I ramble once I start?)

Thanks for all the continued prayers, and the buckets of love.

You are stellar friends. (And, btw, I love the word Stellar.)


Morrells said...

You are the best little writer! You beautiful fam deserves to just live in normalcy so embrace it! I hope it lasts for a very, very, very long time!!! Your always in our prayers!!!

Kellie said...

You are such an inspiration to me!
Based on your past experiences, I know that you'll be able to handle anything that comes your way. You are a fighter. You'll come out on top.

Eileen said...

I love it when you ramble. Ramble on.

And stellar.....
I now love it too. I may have to use it too. Will you share?

You and Travis are my heros. I love and admire the heck out of you.

Haylee Munk Brown said...

You couldn't have said things better. Also, if it makes Trav feel better tell him I started taking celebrex when I was 16! Ha ha ha, I am passed old woman stage now!!

Trisha said...

I just love you Hayley. You are one of the strongest people I know.

The Gundies said...

I am so glad to read this blog and know that it reads almost exactly how Bryon's blog does. Do you ever notice that no matter how dark and scary things get, something good happens later? And since things get so 'crappy' the good things always out shine the brightest stars because you have come from such a dark place. I admire you and your family and feel like we are sisters for having so much misfortune in common. Keep up the good work. Always thinking of you.

Sara Gundersen

Grandmajoann said...

You are definitely in our prayers every night. I thank you for posting the progress and for rambling on. You are a darling family and I wish we saw each other more often.

The Wolfley Family said...

Crap, I don't know why I even checked this blog, but I'm crying again. I guess I was just missing you and have looked at the new pics of your girls a million times. Thanks for your great examples! Love you!